All at once, the room started spinning and panic ensued. I hated this feeling—the shaking, shortness of breath and the urgency to throw up, happening two sometimes three times a day. Struggling to remember where I hid my pack of cigarettes, I find them, buried deep behind my dresser, inside an extra pair of socks. I shouldn’t hide them anymore because I can never seem to remember where I placed them especially in mist of a panic attack. I take one out, place it to my lips and light it. Inhaling deep, I concentrate on the nicotine entering my body, leaving my body tingling and numb. Not thinking about anything else only focusing on inhaling and exhaling smoke, my anxiety subsides.